Help Me Understand..........Bad Years

Help Me Understand..............Bad Years


I’ve had quite a run the past few years, and last night was just one of those nights where all of the bad things that have happened were just pressing down on me. Christmas is a tough time of year after you get a divorce, especially if Christmas and kids and presents were really important to you. I had just finished buying some stockings and stocking stuffers and a wave of sadness just crashed over me because I realized that the family life that I had was gone forever.

That was bad, but I still had to drive to Byron Center to listen to my son’s concert. On the way, waves of sadness and grief kept engulfing me. When I got to the concert, the music was awesome and the entire night was really good. However, during the concert my mind started wandering to the health concerns about my hands. I have some kind of skin disorder that is causing the skin on my fingertips to crack and break open, making it impossible to play guitar. On top of that, my last doctor informed me that I might be getting arthritis in my hands, which would make guitar playing harder and harder, and ultimately, impossible. Needless to say, dark thoughts ruled my night.

But something happened on the way out of the concert that jolted me out of the sadness and self-pity that I was wallowing in. You see, on the way out, there was a young boy who was about 8 years old who was disfigured and in a wheelchair. His grandfather was helping him guide the wheelchair out of the auditorium. The young man was happy and cheerful, and the night had given him a joy that I didn’t have.

It was in that moment that I realized something. I wasn’t ashamed of myself for not being grateful for what I have. But I understood at that moment that although the pain I was feeling was very real, I had so much more to be thankful for. You see, that young man will never run or throw a baseball or play a guitar. I’ve done all of those things in my life and taken them for granted. And even if those things may get taken from me now, I still have experienced them in a life that has been filled with good things.

This young boy who could experience joy despite his circumstances helped me to understand that how we approach things in life is really a matter of perspective. It is my hope that I can change my perspective to reflect the truth that there is so much I have to be thankful for, and I hope this blog will challenge you to do the same.

With Joy,

Blawgerman