Where Do I Get My Number?

Where Do I Get My Number?

Help Me Understand Bailouts…….

Bear Stearns, Freddie Mac, Fannie Mae, Lehman Brothers, and now a big $700,000,000,000 bailout for the entire banking industry. The big guys are dropping like flies. The weird thing is that when they get in trouble, they yell for help and the Feds swoop right in and save the day. Oh yeah. There’s also the little issue of us lowly taxpayers shouldering the burden of the buyouts, bailouts, supports, guarantees, and whatever other scheme the government can concoct to keep us from financial meltdown.

The price tag for the Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae fiasco has been estimated to be from $25 Billion (yes….Billion) to $100 Billion. That’s just chump change compared to the most recent $700 Billion bailout that the feds are trying to push through.

So……………where’s the line?

You know………..the line where you pick a number and wait for your number to be called.

You see, I need a bailout. I guess a buyout would work. Even a guarantee would help me. And shucks, my bailout would only cost a little tiny bit compared to the companies mentioned above. Surely, if the government can shell out $700 Billion to guarantee the financial condition of private investment firms and private insurance firms, they can lay down a couple hundred thousand to assure my financial condition, right? What’s a couple hundred thousand more to Uncle Sam? It’s hardly a fly on the arse of the treasury.

That’s it. I just want to know where I go to get bailed out when I discover that what I’ve been doing is financially “imprudent.” Surely, if our beneficent government can rescue the big guys, they’ve got to be able to fling me a little bitty lifeboat! I’m headed to DC to find the line. If I find it, I’ll be sure to let you know.

Following the Yellow Brick Road,

Blawgerman