The Art of Misspeaking

The Art of Misspeaking


Ok. You see this beautiful woman at a party. She actually talks to you. When she asks what you do for a living, you reply that you are a retired fighter pilot that does extreme skiing now to replace the thrills of combat that you left behind when you retired.

Wow. It works. She is interested in how many missions you made and how many times you narrowly escaped death. She then moves to your extreme skiing. How many mountains? How many countries? Things are going well..............until your friend can’t take it anymore and lets her know that the closest you’ve ever come to the military is the Boy Scouts, that you can’t ski worth a lick (besides the fact that you can’t even afford lift tickets), and your job as an assistant bookkeeper with the donut shop is in peril.

Man........what do you do now? I know. You tell her, “Sorry, I just misspoke.”


Now.....guess what happens next. Does she say, “Well, big guy, I understand that you just misspoke. I mean, that kind of stuff happens. People misspeak all the time, and quite often, it’s to tell a story that would never really happen to them in real life just so they can impress whoever is listening. Let’s go out for dinner anyway and see if sparks will fly...”


Or maybe she says, “I can’t believe that you are such a LIAR! Get the #*$#(@ outta my life.”


Does anyone believe that the first option will be how this sad story ends? Of course, Hillary Clinton can say on numerous occasions that she flew to Bosnia and landed under sniper fire, that the welcoming ceremony had to be moved indoors, and that such death-defying actions qualify to make her Commander-In-Chief. I gotta wonder if she was a fighter pilot who now does extreme skiing.

Well, when Mrs. Clinton was confronted with video that showed a nice, calm welcoming ceremony held right by the plane that even included a whole 7th grade class greeting her on the runway, she calmly asserted, “Well, I just misspoke.” She even went on to opine that, “I’m only human, which may surprise some of you.”


The only thing that surprises me is that we, as a country, didn’t say “I can’t believe that you are such a LIAR! Get the #*$#(@ outta my primaries!”

Oh well, gotta get back to planning my extreme skiing outing for next week.....can’t wait to see Tibet.

Misspokenly Yours,

Blawgerman